Queen Kelley

[WARNING: CONTAINS MILD SPOILERS]

Yes, the end is near…concerning my favorite television show, Lost, that is.

As I write, two episodes remain, though one is reportedly a 2 1/2-hour series finale. The last several episodes of this epic show have provided answers to numerous questions we’ve asked for several years now: Who are the skeletons in the cave? What are Jacob’s origins? How did the Man in Black become a “smoke monster”? What is the source of the mysterious whispers? Why is Richard ageless? Et cetera, et cetera. Some of the answers have disturbed me (particularly the shattering of my ideal of the Jacob character, who seems more clueless than I imagined), some have confirmed my suspicions (the Man in Black is perhaps less evil than I thought), and many have only provoked more questions (I still don’t know the purpose of the Island).

Usually, after watching an episode, I head over to Entertainment Weekly.com to read Doc Jensen’s unpacking of the story. Often much of what he writes flies over my head, but I think this reflection on last week’s episode finally highlights the point of the entire series:

It could be that Lost is philosophically relativistic and religiously pluralistic—but given everything else we’ve [seen] on the show, I think what’s more likely is that Lost just doesn’t trust human beings enough to know “the right answer.” We are too flawed, too damaged, too biased, too selfish, too incapable, too limited, too mortal, just plain too much of this world to be able to really and fully know what this world is really all about. To paraphrase Mother: All our answers will only lead to more questions. It’s an infinite progression into infinite regression—”turtles all the way down” cubed…. I don’t think Lost is saying to stop pursuing truth. Not at all. I think it’s more concerned with how we conduct our search and how we can labor with our neighbor in their search. Because lord knows that the bloody, brutal fight over all this stuff remains more troubling and terrifying than ever. (See full article at All About Lost.)

Interpret these words as you will. I do the same for myself. Lost has been one great big mysterious pile of confusion. Entertaining, yes, but rather frustrating for its continued sense of the unknown and the untold. Kind of like this journey of faith I’m on. I know many people who are completely at peace with the answers they’ve found in their spiritual lives. Though they may have further questions, they are okay with not knowing and they accept that they “see through a glass darkly” for now (1 Cor 13:12).

Sometimes I wish I were like this so the incessant questions about God and faith would stop torturing me. Then again, I find that the process of discovery (or continued mystery) is rewarding in itself. I think Doc is right. Most of us are completely incapable, for various reasons, of reaching Ultimate Truth here on earth. As I watch Lost, most revelations only lead to more questions. As I journey through my faith life, I find that the same thing happens. I feel at peace with one aspect of my beliefs only to question another.

Wikipedia cites a book by Stephen Hawking to explain Doc’s “turtles” comment. Hawking said a scientist once explained the arrangement of our galaxy—the sun in the center and everything orbiting around it. At the end of the lecture, a lady said, “What you have told us is rubbish. The world is really a flat plate supported on the back of a giant tortoise.”

The scientist replied, “What is the tortoise standing on?”

“You’re very clever, young man, very clever,” the lady said. “But it’s turtles all the way down!” (From Hawking, A Brief History in Time [Bantam Books, 1988])

Say what you will about Hawking, but this story resonates with me. The answers to our questions about something as grand and unfathomable as God will simply bring more and more questions. And everyone will have his or her own idea of how to answer them.

Sadly, I think religious sects (and divisions within those sects) will continue to war about their ideas of the Truth. It is indeed a “bloody, brutal fight,” and it is “troubling and terrifying.”

I think Lost, as a series, has touched deeply on the fact that we may not all know exactly where we’re going, why we’re here, what God means to us, how life and death and afterlife will play out, or how we got here in the first place. However, the show has shown effectively that, even in our ignorance of these things, we can still make choices and take leaps of faith that have widespread implications—for good or for evil.

What will I choose?

image from www.ew.com

Last week’s episode was much more low key than recent shows. The focus narrowed to Jack for the majority of the running time, and I felt myself getting antsy for more drama.

1. One of my constant questions was finally answered, though: Why does Locke see Jacob as Christian Shepherd? Apparently, it is because Jack gave Locke’s dead body something that belonged to his father. While the serene-looking corpse lies way too still for a man like John Locke, Jack slips his father’s shoes onto John’s feet. This is the only way Jack can recreate his original flight to the island—to have a body in a coffin that retains something of his father. Doesn’t this answer the question, then? Locke and Shepherd are inextricably bound, and thus Locke sees Christian when he encounters the mysterious Jacob.

2. The Oceanic 6, by some strange twist of events orchestrated by Mrs. Hawking of the swinging pendulum and certainly by Ben, all ended up on the doomed plane again. I guess the rest of the season’s shows will explain how each one was convinced to get on the flight. Frank Lapidus as the pilot was an interesting touch.

3. So where are Sun, Sayid, and, most importantly, Ben, when they finally appear back on the island? And how exactly DID they get there?

4. Does anyone else feel extremely nervous watching plane crashes on TV?

5. How did Jin get from standing by the absent well in the previous episode to wearing Dharma gear and driving the van in this one? And it’s a pity that Sun wasn’t with Jack, Kate, and Hurley to greet her resurrected love.

6. Did anyone else find themselves saying, “Just read the darn suicide note already, Jack”?

This week promises to focus on John Locke, and I can’t wait!

Daniel, Charlotte, Sawyer (image from eonline.com)

Okay, so no more extensively detailed posts that offer my most confused musings on each episode. Last night rocked, though! Here are some quick points.

1. Did you notice Sun’s expression when Ben revealed that Jin lives? I had wondered if there were more to her vendetta than Jin (not that he wasn’t reason enough), such as something involving her daughter or some kind of crazy plot connected to Whidmore, but I was glad to see her unabashed love for Jin in her eyes.

2. Speaking of Ben, Michael Emerson nails him every week. He’s such an intriguing and disgusting character. I have no doubt that he is in complete control of just about everything on the show. And that’s frightening.

3. What is the deal with Daniel Faraday? He seems thoughtful and sympathetic one minute and sinister the next. Now that his mama’s identity is confirmed as Mrs. Hawking, aka Queen Creepy who works directly with Ben, I expect more to unfold about his true motivations.

4. Wasn’t John Locke’s scene deep underground moving? He asked for help, and when he didn’t get it, you could see all the struggles, doubts, hopes, and fears of his life flash across his face. And who wouldn’t be moved when he pulled himself up, protruding leg bone and all, and made his way to the donkey wheel. What a hero! Even if he’s wrong, clearly he thinks he’s doing what’s best for everyone.

5. Poor Charlotte. At least her last moment seemed pleasant.

6. Smoky’s back! Was it not incredibly spooky when the black smoke monster dragged the Frenchman through the jungle and deep into the dark hole? As for the French, now we know that Rousseau’s team did not, as she told the castaways a few seasons ago, die of some strange sickness. Rather, they began acting strangely possibly due to their association with Smoky and she (age 16 and pregnant, no less) shot most of them. I am curious as to how Ben ends up with her daughter.

7. Don’t you just love Sawyer? Okay, maybe I’m partial.

8. Kate’s pretty ticked at Jack, so it’ll be interesting to see how they go from ice-cold anger to heated passion by next week’s episode (at least as indicated in the preview).

9. I think Jack should be scared of Sayid. Don’t you?

10. It seems that Whidmore’s little group of scientists—Daniel, Charlotte, and Miles—had all been on the island before. We’re still awaiting confirmation of Miles’s presence in the past, but I’ll bet it’s coming.

11. Why in the world is Christian Shepherd personifying “Jacob”? I’ve been wondering that for a while now.

Looking forward to more!

Finally, at long last, our favorite bewildering show returned Wednesday night. And finally, nearly a week later, I am sitting down to reflect on it. The two new episodes that aired last week continued the Lost trend of raising more questions than they answered. But they did offer some answers.

1. We see that Asian Dharma guy has a wife and kid. It all seems so normal until he sits in front of the camera to record one of his instruction videos (needing no script) and then begins to get visibly agitated by interruptions. That is, until he realizes his workers have found the energy field of the Island. He mentions the possibility of time travel, and we see the image of the wheel, so we know this is where Ben turned the crank. Additionally, Daniel is there! What more does Dharma guy know?

2. A few scenes later we get our first real glimpse of time travel this season, as the Island moves in time, along with the people on it. Our heroic survivors face one difficulty after another, ranging from the loss of their camp and supplies to being shot with fiery arrows. It appears that they will soon die, either of a strange sickness or attacks, if the 6 fail to return. The messianic figure of Locke is separated from the others for the majority of the airtime, meeting people like Others Ethan and Richard “the Ageless,” each of whom further define his role in saving the island. Apparently, he has to get the Oceanic 6 back and will die in the process (as we know from seeing him in the coffin). Does the concept of time travel make anyone else’s brain hurt like it does mine?

3. Sayid springs Hurley from the asylum only to put him in grave danger. Eventually, Ben comes for them both and Hurley is so freaked that he turns himself in to the cops staked outside his home, admitting to murders he didn’t commit. Kate flees to LA after lawyers come to test her relationship to Aaron (in a scene complete with a creepy dream in which Claire tells her not to take Aaron back to the Island). Sun is intent on killing Ben with Widmore’s help. Clearly, Ben’s little roundup game isn’t going as well as he planned. Will he be able to get them all to comply? If he does, what will happen to everyone? Is Ben intending to reclaim his role as Island leader? After all, what is there for him in the off-island world? And who is the butcher woman who offers to keep Locke’s body safe for Ben?

4. The show ends with a scene between Ben and the Hawking lady we’ve seen before. She says the event window has been determined and that Ben has 70 hours. “What happens if I can’t get them all?” Ben asks. “God help us all,” the woman replies gravely. Indeed.

It will be interesting, to state it mildly, to see what the show’s writers and directors have in store for us this season. I, for one, am grateful for the consistency among the characters. Consider Hurley. He’s always funny, even when he is suffering or confused or frightened. Who else but Hurley would see Ana Lucia in a hallucination? Who else but Hurley would fling a hot pocket at Benjamin Linus? Who else but Hurley would give his mom a Cliff’s Notes version of the craziness that happened on the Island? Consider Sawyer. Even in the middle of a battle for his life, he can think of new nicknames for those around him. Even in the confusion of time travel, he looks great shirtless. Consider Kate. She’s still awkward as a mom. She’s still running. Consider Jack. Like last season, he thinks he has everyone’s best interest at heart and struggles to do the best thing for all. He’s probably wrong, of course, but you’ve got to give the guy credit.

Anyone else looking forward to tomorrow night’s episode?

I just finished watching Larry King Live, a show I never usually watch on a station I didn’t even realize we got through basic cable. I’m sure that, being such a long-running show masterminded by a well-known interviewer, it frequently offers intriguing topics and features intriguing people. Even so, it’s simply not on my “to-watch” list (which, admittedly, is quite small these days).

Tonight, though, Steven Curtis Chapman, his wife Mary Beth, and their three biological children, Emily, Caleb, and Will Franklin, appeared on the show and endured a Larry King-style interview about the death of their daughter and sister Maria Sue. Translation: Larry asked each of them questions no one should ever have to answer about subjects no decent person ever approaches.

And you know what? The incredible, take-your-breath-away pain the Chapman family still feels was written all over their faces. And, paradoxically, so was their unwavering hope in this being we call God, the one who allows evil and suffering and tragedy for who knows why. Some of them admitted their anger, doubts, and questions toward God. All of them affirmed their belief that little Maria is with Jesus right now. They each exhibited great trust that they will pull through these worst of days, but they acknowledged that their loss is one that will walk with them for a lifetime.

I watched these same five people on Good Morning America yesterday morning. Robin Roberts, their interviewer for that segment, was infinitely more caring and sensitive than Mr. King. However, as many viewers pointed out on Jim Houser’s blog, it was obvious that SCC and MB’s words had been edited to steer clear of the words “God” and “Jesus” in favor of “faith.” It worked for me, as I’m sure it did for thousands who watched the interview. Tonight, though, there was no censoring of live TV. Tonight it was obvious where the Chapman family places their faith. Ironic, isn’t it, that the Truth for this family would be proclaimed so boldly in response to the pointed questions of a man hardened by years of interviews.

This family, in the depths of the greatest grief I can personally imagine, managed to minister to me. They, like others whose journeys I’ve followed, have shown once again that it is possible to survive even the most heartbreaking losses with HOPE.

I’ll close with the new verse Steven added to his already touching song “Yours,” from his new album Live in this Moment:

I’ve walked the valley of death’s shadow
So deep and dark that I could barely breathe
I’ve had to let go of more than I could bear
And questioned everything that I believe
But still even here 
in this great darkness
A comfort and hope come breaking through
As I can say in life or death
God we belong to you.

And now we know. This fulfilling, sometimes heart-wrenching episode allowed us to say goodbye for another eight months, wrapping up some stories and starting others, and most importantly, offering an answer to a season-long question. Who’s in the coffin?

1. I’ll start with the obvious—John Locke is the man in the coffin. (Kudos to all who theorized as much!) We saw Jack come to the unofficial “funeral” for the unidentified individual back at the season’s beginning. Now we know. Somehow, the man whom Ben left in charge of the group of Others is dead and off the island some four years later. This is after he initiated contact with at least some of the Oceanic 6 under the alias “Jeremy Bentham,” presumably to protect his identity. Of course we all want to know what happened. We’ll just have to wait. I, however, believe that Ben has everything fully under control to design the outcome he desires.

2. On Doc Jensen’s teaser, I read this quote from executive producer Carlton Cuse: “Our characters’ fates and our story for the season all come down to this: Who’s right about the island? Jack the empiricist or Locke the man of faith?” Did anyone think that question was answered in the finale? On first thought, I’d say Locke, the man of faith, was right. Jack is desolate in his life off the island, separated from Kate, addicted to painkillers and booze, and relentlessly attempting to get back. But then, we were shown Locke’s body in the coffin. Why did this man, who truly loved the island, apparently leave it? Or did he? Did he acquire the ability to time travel? Is he really dead? Time will tell.

3. Once again, Michael Emerson’s acting completely convinced me that Benjamin Linus is in total control of what is happening on this show. He has been surprised a few times—one, when his daughter was killed, and two, when he learned that Keamy’s arm could signal a bomb aboard the freighter. Even when surprised, though, he quickly regains the upper hand. He is a master at appearing innocent at one moment and showing icy madness the next. I’m not certain exactly what motivates him. He doesn’t seem to love anyone. Even with Alex, their relationship seemed to be possessor and possessed. Ben pined for Juliet, but he completely creeped her out by killing her beloved, Goodman. What is behind his actions? It can’t be money. He’s obviously got access to plenty of that. When we look back at his childhood—basically killing his mother through his own birth, then being hated and constantly berated by his father—we can see the beginnings of a man who wants no one to manipulate him. Instead, he wants to be the manipulator. And boy is he good at it. Before he even went down below, why did Ben say to John, “We’re going somewhere cold”? He didn’t allow John to go, so who’s “we”? There was one moment in this episode when Ben was alone. He had climbed down into the icy chamber below the Orchid and was about to turn the huge wheel, when he looked up and said, “I hope you’re happy, Jacob.” Almost as if he were talking to God. Someone please tell me what this means. When Ben turned the wheel, the island moved. It was quite a sight for those on the out-of-fuel chopper…and for me…when the island was swallowed by the sea. Where did it go? (As for the island disappearing, I can’t believe the poor survivors had to endure another crash when the chopper fell into the sea.)

4. Poor Daniel Faraday. His would-be girlfriend Charlotte chose to stay on the island. What a mystery. Miles saw within her that she has been on the island before. As they said goodbye, Charlotte reminded Daniel that she has been “looking for where I was born.” Hmmm. Miles is staying put, too, so hopefully we’ll get some good information on these two next season.

5. What is going on with Sun in the off-island future? She has become a powerful, wealthy, controlling woman. What is her motivation for working with Charles Widmore? Indirectly, he was responsible for her husband’s death. Which brings me to dear Jin. It appears that he died when the freighter blew up. What a heart-wrenching scene to watch her screaming for him! What an unreadable look she threw at Jack when he told her “he’s gone.” Later, we learn that she blames Jack for what happened to Jin. Does Sun think Jin might still be living? Is she hoping to do some time travel to reverse the events? Is that even possible? Does she simply want to find his body?

6. The ageless Other Richard Alpert and his crew ended up helping the Oceanic 6 get off the island—for the hefty price of rescuing Ben from Keamy and his baddies. Why doesn’t Richard appear to age? Why didn’t John Locke appear to recognize Richard back when he first went to the Other camp (when they had his kidney-stealing father)? Surely you can’t forget a face like that, even if you meet him when you’re a child. What are the Others doing? Where are they living? What do they plan to do with Locke as their leader? What do they do, exactly?

7. Mr. Indestructible Keamy did eventually die, resulting in a blown-up freighter and, supposedly, a dead Michael (given passage into the afterlife by Christian Shephard, nonetheless!) and Jin. Keamy died because Ben had a Psycho moment of revenge for Alex’s death, even though he knew killing Keamy would kill possibly dozens of others.

8. We got to see teenaged Walt when he visited Hurley at the mental institution. I hope the passage of time will explain how old he looked. I’m not sure when that scene was supposed to have taken place. Kate told bearded Jack at one point that it had been three years since he’d left her and Aaron, so by the time Jack goes wack, they’ve been off the island for some four years, perhaps. Was this when Walt came to visit? And when was Sayid’s late-night visit to Hurley, interrupting his chess game with an invisible Mr. Eko to urge him to come along to a place where they’ll be safe? “We’re being watched,” Sayid insisted. Why are they all in such danger?

9. Kate’s dream was downright terrifying—a supposed intruder, only to become Claire, who warned Kate not to bring Aaron back to the island. Later, when Ben startled Jack at the funeral parlor, and just before we saw Locke in the coffin, Ben said he had some ideas about how to get them all back on the island. Then he added, “I said all of you. We’re gonna have to bring him too,” and nodded at Locke. Does “all” mean the six, plus Locke, and possibly plus others? Don’t I remember someone saying there were others who left the island? Or did that mean Locke, aside from the six?

10. Can I just say I’m glad I get to enjoy Sawyer for a few more episodes, at least? After his plummet into the sea, I wasn’t so sure, but his bare-chested return to the beach, after swimming what could have been a mile or two, made me feel better. (: How could we do without that Southern drawl and the plethora of hilarious nicknames? (Lapidus=”Kenny Rogers”!)

Okay, my husband just sighed and went up to bed. Clearly he thinks this “report” is running too long. I took about a page of notes while I watched. It has been so much to process. And still, still, still I have more questions than answers. I suppose that is the genius—and the frustration—of the show. Until next year…

Our Mother’s Day began with a bang bright and early, as the weather siren started blaring around 5:30 am. The King hurried downstairs to check the weather radio, while I turned on the local news. The radar picture resembled Ladybug’s recent experiment with red paint—a large, disorganized blob. It was a fast-moving system that quickly earned a tornado warning. While I nervously watched the news, the King stepped onto the front porch to assess the situation. Do we wake the girls or not? When the power shut off around 5:50, we began scrambling for flashlights and candles (a bit late on our part, I’ll admit). My husband looked outside once more. “Get them! The rain’s blowing completely sideways.” [Photo by Jason Vorhees for The Macon Telegraph.]

Butterfly was already sitting up in bed in complete darkness, wondering what had happened to her colored lights. The four of us scrambled downstairs and sat on a pile of pillows in the short hallway between our dining room/guest room and the playroom. The King and I had argued, differing on what we viewed as the safest location (again, a bit late on our part), but had to choose quickly in the end. The girls enjoyed making shadows with the flashlights while the storm got eerily quiet, then boomed for a few minutes, then settled back down. Our power stayed off for a mere forty-five minutes, long enough for us to enjoy a cold breakfast by the light of smelly candles.

The rest of our day was relatively carefree, unlike that of many Macon residents. We went to church, I got to take a nap, and then the girls and I spent an hour in the windy backyard, enjoying the sand and sun while the King cut the grass in the front. Mere miles from our neighborhood, a reported six tornadoes severely damaged homes and businesses, shutting off power and water supplies for hours. That evening, families swarmed to our side of town seeking open restaurants, grocery stores, and entertainment.

My best friends and I, who had made reservations at an elegant restaurant, eventually found ourselves driving from place to place looking for food. Finally, around 8:00, we settled for frozen pizza (for two of us), steak & veggies (for the other), and molten lava cake (for everyone!) from Kroger—all brought to my house for a few hours of togetherness. It wasn’t what we anticipated for our Mother’s Day gathering, but we made the most of it, chatting and watching the pilot episode of Gilmore Girls.

This Mother’s Day as all days, I’m grateful to God for my two precious little girls—for the joy they bring me each day, their laughter, their play, their hugs and kisses, and their innocent and unabashed delight in the world. I’m grateful for my amazing King, who supports my choices as a mother and helps me remember to be myself. I’m grateful for my best girlfriends, who not only share their parenting stories with me but take me away from the real world from time to time. I’m grateful for my grandmothers, whom I’m honored to know and learn from. I’m grateful for my mother-in-law, whose love and care for me are overwhelmingly evident. And I’m grateful, more than anything, for my own mother, who has taught me so much about living—as a mother, as a wife, and as a woman. I love you all.

Everything I read about Lost says these last few episodes will be some of the “best moments on television.” Aside from the fact that all shows say that about themselves, I think the claim may be right in this case. Thursday’s episode was PACKED. I’m not even sure where to begin.

1. The focus on John Locke as possible savior of the island (a role for which he’s apparently been molded his entire life) took him from birth to a mysterious confrontation in Jacob’s cabin–with Jack’s father Christian and half-sister Claire. Early in life, John exhibited rare gifts and quite a bit of strangeness, which got him ridiculed and worse in high school. On at least two different occasions, the ageless Other Richard Alpert entered his life, and Locke appeared to fail Richard’s “test”–whatever it meant and whatever it was for. He also encountered Matthew Abbaddon, who gave Locke advice and said, “You’ll owe me one.” Hmm. In the Island-present, Locke, Ben, and Hurley seek Jacob’s cabin, and Locke is aided in his dreams by a guy dead 12 years–ever since Ben gassed the Dharma group under someone else’s leadership, or so Ben claims (”not my decision”). Clearly resentful of Locke’s new status, Ben tells him there are “consequences to being chosen” and that “destiny is…fickle.” To sum up John’s storyline here, he asks Christian and Claire, “How do I save the island?” and they want him to move it. Okay.

2. There appear to be about three different groups of freighter folks: the ones who want to blow up everything, shoot everybody, and allow people to jump overboard out of craziness; the ones who are scientists, given perhaps some inside info but not enough; and the ones who wish to do their job but are unaware of the deeper implications. This part of the story is simply painful and frustrating. There are various levels of understanding on the part of the freighter people. Everyone seems to have a different idea of the reason for approaching the island. It is clear from this episode that the island survivors are in desperate danger. It appears that Ben really is trying to save the island through Michael’s actions on the boat (though he is failing, thus Locke must step up to the plate). It seems, too, that Frank Lapidus, the pilot, desires to keep innocent people from dying. But why did he drop the phone with the radar showing the chopper’s location? Why didn’t he drop a warning instead? Better yet, why didn’t he deviate from the coordinates and drown all the baddies (sacrificing himself) in the sea?

3. More questions: Did the time difference account for the doctor’s throat being slit on the boat after the Morse code communication already said he’d washed up dead on the island? How will Sayid decide whom to take back on his tiny boat, and once they get to the freighter, how will they survive being there? Will Ben really kill Penelope, as he claimed he would when he time traveled to speak to Widmore? What will Desmond do then, since she appears to be his sustaining hope? Is Claire dead? Why is Christian important enough to speak for Jacob? He was a terrible father and a drunken doctor before he died. Is this his redemption? Did someone orchestrate to have these exact people involved in the plane crash that brought them to the island? If so, who, and for what overall purpose? Arrghh.

Obviously, this was one of the deeper and stranger episodes of the season. To read more coherent ideas about it, go to this link and read Doc Jensen’s report. I will keep watching, but I will also continue to be befuddled by it all.

I got to Lost a lot later this week than I intended, but the fabulous weekend made up for the delay. This episode could have been subtitled “Jack Falls Apart.”

1. The Island-present story concerned the appendectomy involving one of the show’s love triangles–this time Juliet (the doc), Jack (the other doc and also the patient), and Kate (the girl with no medical experience whom Jack asks to be present). Then there was Bernard, who assisted quite well. Let me just say that Jack drives me insane. Juliet pegged him when she said, “You don’t want to be out of control.” He wanted to be conscious during his incredibly painful surgery so he could tell her what to do. Unfortunately for him, the whole show revealed how not in control he actually is. As for the love triangle, it was good to hear that Juliet knew how unpassionate Jack’s kiss was, because I had trouble believing that scene when it originally aired.

2. In the off-Island future, Hurley is completely nutters. Or is he? He claims he receives regular visits from Charlie (with a message for Jack: “You’re not supposed to raise him”), and he is also correct when he tells Jack he will soon have a visitor, as Daddy Shephard makes several appearances. Is he ghost? hallucination? island mirage? Time will tell. It’s clear, though, that only Jack (and later Jack’s half-sister Claire on the Island!) can see him.

3. More from the freighter folks. I can’t figure out whether the scientists, especially Daniel and Charlotte, are trustworthy even one small bit (I’m convinced Miles is completely conniving). One minute they’re assisting, the next they’re deceiving. It’s clear they have some skins to save, and they’re probably most concerned about their own. It’s a credit to our survivors that the scientists/ghost hunter haven’t been tortured or killed yet because they are certainly frustrating. At least Jin got tough with them in this episode. Then we get a random appearance of Lapidus the pilot, careening through the jungle and warning Sawyer, Claire, and Miles of tough guy’s approach. Tough guy and his crew somehow survived Smokey.

4. In the future, Jack’s seemingly idyllic life with Kate and Aaron quickly spirals out of control (ironically for the Control Freak). He sees dad and freaks out, combines prescription drugs with alcohol for maybe the first of many occasions, doubts his abilities to parent Aaron (he seems to know about his relation to Claire at this point), and grows suspicious of Kate, who, agreeably, is acting suspicious. Back on the Island, Sawyer apparently asked her to “do something for him,” and she’s carrying that out, much to Jack’s chagrin. Jack’s response? “He chose to stay. I’m the one who saved you.”

5. Claire apparently walked into the woods with Christian Shephard, her father, leaving baby Aaron propped on some bushes. Let’s hope this story continues soon. A show specifically highlighting Claire would be helpful.

I wonder what’s next? According to the previews, something about a guy who’s been dead for ten years…

UPDATE: To my frustration, something corrupted this post, so I lost most of my comments about episode 9. This is unfortunate because it was one of my favorites of the season. If you need a recap, go to this Entertainment Weekly site for a fair summary.

We’re back! I didn’t get to watch the show until Friday night, and then my carefully planned extra 2 minutes of recording on the DVR still cut me short! I missed Ben’s final words to Widmore (but fortunately not the entire scene) and of course next week’s previews. This week, I’ll add 10 extra minutes to the recording time just to be sure. We learned about the seemingly unconquerable Ben this week and even got to view–gasp!–a somewhat human side to him.

1. I spent most of the episode trying to decide how much Ben knew/orchestrated and how much actually surprised him. Clearly Alex’s death blindsided him; he didn’t expect that. But did he know he was sending her, Rousseau, and Karl into danger when he urged them to leave in episode 8? Did he realize that Rousseau and Karl would die? That Alex would be used to try to bribe him outside his home? That the guy bribing him would be working for Whidmore? I think he probably knew some of these things. Obviously, though, he didn’t believe Alex would die–even up to the moment when he dismissed her as “not my daughter” and a “pawn.” His reaction to her death and his visible grief after the boat guys left and/or were demolished by “Smokey” showed us that Ben does have some raw humanity left beneath his tough exterior. (Michael Emerson’s delivery in this episode was stellar.)

2. “He changed the rules,” Ben muttered after his “adopted” daughter died of a gunshot wound before his eyes. “He” is apparently Charles Widmore, with whom Ben is involved in a brutal game for a prize of who knows what. At the end, before my DVD stopped playing, I did hear Ben promise Widmore that he would avenge Alex’s death by killing Widmore’s daughter Penny, coincidentally Desmond’s one true love.

Robin posted this hilarious Lost montage. If you need a review of the past season thus far (or heck, all past seasons), you should definitely check it out. After viewing it–and laughing out loud the entire time–I said, “My sentiments exactly!”

So not only do we have to wait an entire month before we get a new episode, but when it returns, it’ll start at 10:00! I can’t predict what in the world is going to happen with this show, but I do foresee utilizing the DVR for Lost in my future. Thoughts:

1. This episode gave us tons of essential information regarding Michael. Unlike I supposed, he actually got back to New York rather than heading straight for the freighter when Ben gave him the coordinates. In Manhattan, he commenced living a pitiful life, consumed with guilt over the murders he committed on the Island. Essentially, he lost Walt again and decided to end his life.
2. Except that he can’t end it. It appears that the Island’s mysterious forces reach even to the United States and continue to affect people’s lives after they find a way off. It’s only fitting, after all. Big Tom shows up, complete with a lover and indulgent food, and convinces Michael that he has more work to do.
3. Charles Widmore, Penny’s father, is confirmed as the mastermind behind the staged 815 crash in the sea, and it seems he covets the Island enough to want to kill all its inhabitants. Why is this necessary? Because they would give away its secrets, which he hopes to use to become even richer (really, how much money does one need)? Is this why the Oceanic 6 are sworn to such secrecy that they are living a lie in the off-Island future?
4. Enter the seemingly omnipotent, omniscient Ben, who secured Michael as a spy on the freighter with the intention of killing everyone on it (except, as he indicated to Michael, a few innocents). Ben’s means of convincing Michael to do his part is the promise of redemption for his murders of Cindy and Ana Lucia; supposedly, if he kills the freighter folks, he’ll in effect save the lives of everyone remaining on the Island, including, of course, Ben.
5. Perhaps Ben is not quite so all-knowing and all-powerful, for did he foresee Sayid’s reaction to Michael’s story? “So you’re telling me that you’re working for Benjamin Linus,” Sayid says, then rushes Michael straight to the ship’s captain (whom Michael earlier anonymously warned him and Desmond not to trust) and rats him out. Did Ben know this would happen? Is this what he wanted to happen? Is this his means of getting Sayid to be his personal hired hitman in the future?
6. In other news, it would seem that, contrary to all arguments, the Oceanic 6 are set: Kate, Jack, Hurley, Sayid, Sun, and Aaron. Also, Locke is an idiot when it comes to Ben (Johnny-Boy, I’d love to hear your thoughts on Locke and Ben!). Is it just me or does he seem completely unsure of himself this season?
7. Finally, there was the subplot of Rousseau, Alex, and Carl, which warrants its own number here. First, I never quite understood the true relationship of these women to Ben. I’m sure I’ve simply missed it with all the other plot complexity (not to mention the 9-month wait for new episodes). But…Is Alex Ben’s biological daughter, or did he steal her from Rousseau? If the former, how in the world did Rousseau and Ben ever hook up in that way? WHY? If anyone can explain this, I’ll be grateful. Now to what happened tonight. Did Ben know exactly what he was doing when he sent the three toward the Temple station? I’m betting he did. Why, then, is it necessary for him to get rid of Rousseau? (I have to admit that Carl was expendable in my book.) Did he plan for Alex to be murdered too? What stopped the shooters? Or did anything stop them other than the show’s closing credits?

Aaauuughh. This show always, always raises more questions than it answers. And now I have to wait a month to get more answers and raise even more questions.

I would have begun this post by saying I’m glad someone finally found some happiness off the island, and that Jin and Sun deserved quality time together after the shambles of their early married life. But, as we know, that’s not exactly the case. Thoughts:

1. It was cruel of the writers/directors/ producers (whoever’s in charge of such things) to trick us with a combo flashback/flash forward. Honestly, I was more confused by this episode than the time travel one involving Desmond. Admittedly, I’m a bit slow with such things, and I did think Jin’s obsession with the panda was a bit creepy and he seemed more neurotic than Island Jin, but I still didn’t understand until the end of the show. Which, I suppose, was the intention.
2. So was Jin the one in the coffin at the viewing Jack attended in last year’s finale? If so, why didn’t Kate go to the visitation? Why didn’t Hurley? Hurley at least was supportive after the baby’s birth, even visiting Jin’s grave with Sun.
3. It seems that the consensus is that Hurley, Jack, Kate, and Sayid (and now Sun and Jin, though he’s deceased) are part of the Oceanic 6. My husband (remember that he is only a Shallow Thinker at best) proposed tonight that Sayid may not be in that official group because no one knows he’s back. He’s on a secret homicide mission for Ben and is under cover, so to speak. He wouldn’t have been recognized/rewarded as a survivor along with the others. What do you think of this hypothesis?
4. Funniest line in tonight’s episode (paraphrased because I can’t recall the exact words): “That’s not supposed to be there!” Said by the weird doctor guy when he led Sayid and Desmond to their nice, cozy, roach-infested quarters on the ship; he was looking toward the HUGE blood spatter on the wall. Sorry. This just struck me as funny.
5. Here are the questions everyone will be trying to answer: Can the captain be trusted (despite the note that said not to trust him, supposedly slipped under the door by “Kevin,” aka Michael, who was last seen on a nice boat jetting away from the island with his son Walt)? Can Michael, who killed innocents in order to get to his son and get off the island, be trusted? Is he indeed the man Ben has on the boat? And the major question that is replayed over and over: Can Ben be trusted? My answer to all of these? NO. Thus far, the only moral I get from this season is TRUST NO ONE.
6. What IS IT with the boat people anyway?
7. Did Ben stage the Oceanic 815 crash beneath the ocean? He apparently has the financial resources to do so. And if he did, why?

Well then. Until next week. Sigh.

Great episode as always, and it explained so much about Juliet. Trust was a major issue the entire hour. Thoughts for episode 6:

1. I finally feel that we can trust Juliet–at least somewhat. Not only was she removed from her home (she may have accepted the job, but her vulnerability at the time of hire and her new employers’ lack of forthrightness make her as good as kidnapped), but she is also the object of creepy Ben’s twisted affections. While I’d never condone an affair with a married man, it is clear that Juliet needed an anchor when she got to the island. She found it in Goodwin, which was unfortunate for both of them in several ways. Probably in the creepiest Lost scene I’ve watched yet, Ben showed Juliet Goodwin’s body, then told her she’s “MINE.” The look in his eyes–almost animal-like, but completely controlling, was chilling to say the least.
2. After learning what we did about Ben–that his lust for Juliet is great enough to drive him to indirect murder (not to mention that he gassed an entire group of Dharma people years ago)–I have a difficult time figuring out what to think about him. He’s rotten, controlling, sinister, and incredibly manipulative. Yet, he knows so much, and he obviously has the ability to be in several places at once. Time travel, perhaps? John Locke has taken some tentative steps toward trusting Ben. Is this the right thing to do? My gut tells me no. Still, Ben did reveal some answers, especially related to Penny’s father, Mr. Whidmore, whom some have hypothesized is masterminding the entire attack on anyone connected to the island, even after the survivors return to the “real world.” Ben says Whidmore is attempting to exploit the island’s mysterious capabilities. Who wouldn’t? Even with this info, I think Locke was wrong to get Ben out of the basement. Now Ben is completely in control again. The smirk on his face toward Hurley and Sawyer said it all. Another related thought: how deeply is Penny connected with her father’s intentions? Her evident love for Desmond would tell me she’s innocent when it comes to Dad’s designs.
3. Is it just me, or do Jack and Juliet have no chemistry at all? Something about their interactions is cold and unfeeling. It’s almost like Jack is forcing himself to care for her romantically, maybe to bandage his pain concerning Kate. Their kisses are not passionate. Honestly, I don’t even feel that Juliet loves Jack. She likes him, sure, but he’s a bit of an island rebound, isn’t he? The girl needs to get back to the mainland. It’s very interesting to compare pre-Island Juliet to her present self. She’s changed from a sweet, sunny personality into someone guarded, suspicious, and hesitant to feel. Understandably so.
4. Why does Kate always turn her back? She is constantly getting herself into trouble. Sigh.

Ready for next week and our final Oceanic 6 member! (Obviously, it wasn’t baby Aaron.)

Whoa. Do I start all my Lost posts with that word? Well, it fits. This episode was completely heart-wrenching. All I could think was, “We’re gonna lose Desmond.” And of course the writers wanted us to think that, to hurt for it, and to hope for a better outcome…which we got. My thoughts, spoiler-filled as always:

1. I’m an idiot when it comes to issues of time travel. People had to explain Back to the Future to me. It’s a good thing the King decided to sit through another episode at my side, because he grasps those ideas more easily, I guess since he’s a math/science nerd. Anyway, we know there’s a time differential between the island and the rest of the world, and we presume it’s 31 minutes, but who knows? It could be more or less. It could vary. The island is a mystery for sure.
2. It appears that getting survivors off this island will be, shall we say, difficult. Seeing the horrible “side effects” Desmond (not to mention Minkowski) endured, I have to wonder if anyone else would be affected. Then there was the bit about having to be exposed to electromagnetic forces for the side effects to occur. Desmond was, of course, present at the destruction of the hatch, which caused a massive release of magnetic pressure (or something). Daniel Faraday was exposed to a large amount of radiation when he did experiments, so he is obviously in danger as well. This would explain his memory game with Charlotte and his relief at realizing that Desmond is his constant. (It’s a good thing he saved Desmond’s life.) But what about the rest of the survivors? Have they experienced enough of the radiation/electromagnetic whatever to endanger their journey away from the island? (Especially Locke, who was also present at the Hatch destruction.)
3. Why are the people on the boat so hostile? Why can’t they be more forthright about what they’re doing? Why is everything such a big secret? Ditto for the “freighters” who are on the island–Daniel (who, admittedly, has shared more than anyone else), Charlotte, Miles.
4. I am SO glad Penny answered that phone on Christmas Eve. I was not ready to lose Desmond.

That’s all I have tonight. This episode was even more brain-bending than usual for me. I think I need to go lie down now. 

I spent most of this episode trying to remember whether the writers had told us about Kate’s pregnancy by Sawyer. I remembered it being hinted at, but I didn’t think it had been confirmed. Well, it hadn’t, and for good reason. My thoughts after this week’s episode:

1. I recalled from last week’s previews that we would learn about the fifth member of the “Oceanic Six.” Since we already knew about Kate, I figured we’d get a reveal right at the show’s end. As Kate climbed the stairs of her home after being vindicated, I said aloud, “It could be Aaron.” I was right. My question is this: What horrible thing happened on the island that would split Claire from her beloved infant?
2. Following that topic, Kate told Jack at the end of the episode, “I know why you don’t want to see the baby.” Is it because Jack thinks the baby is Sawyer’s, or because he knows it’s Aaron, thus his nephew? We learned in a previous season that Jack and Claire are half-siblings, sharing the same father. In the future, has Jack discovered this about he and Claire? If so, why is he hesitant to see his nephew?
3. I have to keep wondering, who in the world is this Benjamin Linus, and why does Miles think Ben can access millions of dollars? After last week’s flash-forward that showed Ben ordering even Sayid around, it is obvious that he has tremendous power, but who has given it to him, and for what purpose?
4. Locke put a grenade in Miles’s mouth. Wow. He’s really angry now. More importantly, he is losing control. That was obvious when he slammed Ben’s food tray against the wall. Ben is truly getting to Locke, and this is frustrating for me. I wish Locke didn’t have to lose his mysterious island connection, as he seems to be doing.
5. Did Sawyer not know that pregnant women who conceive on the island die? Because that would have been a great reason to be relieved that Kate was not indeed pregnant. It would have sounded a lot better to Kate’s ears than “What would we have done with a baby?”
6. What has happened to Sayid and Desmond and Frank the pilot?
7. And one more thing that bothers me: After her initial reaction to Charlie’s death a few episodes ago, Claire hasn’t visibly mourned for him at all. That’s just wrong.

As always, there is much to ponder, and another whole week to wait. 

Wow. Wow, wow, wow, wow. Knock me over with a feather. Okay, here are this week’s thoughts:
1. I can’t ignore the doozy that ended the show: as Lance hypothesized, Sayid makes it off the island, but the kicker is that he IS WORKING FOR BEN. Returning to his roots of cold-hearted torturer, he stalks people, makes contact with them, and then kills them. He’s not quite cold-hearted about it, though. As we saw, he began to care deeply for one of his contacts. And he was actually after her boss, though she got shot in the process. The irony is that she and her mysterious boss were after Sayid for HIS boss, who just happens to be, surprise of all surprises, BENJAMIN LINUS. What a shocker!
2. Even after exhibiting jealousy about Jack and Juliet’s camaraderie, Kate apparently chose to stay with the Locke group after going there to retrieve Charlotte. She and Sawyer had an interesting conversation in which he admitted not wanting to leave the island (for what is waiting for him in the real world other than possible jail time for murder?). He proposed that the two of them hang around and try to “play house.” Judging from next week’s previews, they take playing house very seriously.
3. We saw a bit of uncertainty on Locke’s part when he couldn’t find Jacob’s cabin. Ben jumped right on it by commenting that John wanted someone to tell him what to do next.
4. When Hurley asked Miles if the “rescue” team had come to kill them, Miles answered, “Not yet.” Right before that, when Hurley was talking to Sayid about the team’s possible mission, Miles cut his eyes ever so briefly in the camera’s direction, indicating that Hurley might be right about the survivors being disposable and certainly not the reason for the team’s arrival.
5. What kind of experiment did Daniel Faraday do? Obviously it had something to do with where the island actually is in relation to how it appears on an outsider’s computer charts. The missile fired off by the boat, containing a time clock, arrived on the island 30 or so minutes after it should have. Then, when pilot guy was getting ready to fly the chopper off, Daniel warned him to stay on the exact same course he used to approach the island, not deviating even slightly. The team arrived in an emergency landing, with all but the pilot bailing out at the last minute. How will the pilot mimic that?

I had more thoughts, but my mind is too full to remember them. I only wonder, who in the world is this Benjamin Linus, and why does he have so much power? He seems invincible, though he does bleed and get bruises. Also, can someone answer this? Why can’t those who want to stay on the island simply stay on the island, and those who want to leave simply leave? I mean, I know it’s been difficult for anyone to leave, but why is Locke so hung up on NO ONE getting off the island? Theories welcome. (Johnny-boy?)

Oh please let this happen!

In case you’re interested, here is the current status on episodes remaining for your favorite shows.

What an incredibly dense episode. And, as always, it sparked more questions than it answered. Here are my thoughts:

1. The mysterious Abbaddon was the mastermind behind sending the boat team to search for the island. Getting Benjamin Linus is the reason for the mission. Is it because Ben killed all those Dharma folks? I can still see the mass grave in my mind.
2. Who are the dead bodies that appear on the 815 plane, which was discovered on the ocean floor? As we learned last season, none of the passengers apparently survived, though we see many of them alive and well on the island.
3. What is with John Locke? Is he completely crazy? What does it mean that Hurley saw Jacob’s cabin? Clearly, knowing that he saw it affected both Ben and John.
4. It seemed that Ben was telling the truth when John held a gun to his head (who wouldn’t?). He knew the names (and much more) of the helicopter team and why they were there. He also claimed not to know what the black smoke is.
5. Where are all of the Others? Is this something that’s been explained and I have forgotten? I know a handful were killed when they raided the beach looking for pregnant women. But there was a large group of them. Where have they gone? If anyone knows this, please comment.
6. Both Jack and his group and John and his group seem rather “Other-like”–suspicious, defensive, wary toward the newcomers. These feelings are completely warranted, but it does seem that they’ve become a bit like the original Others when it comes to new arrivals on the island.

As usual, I have no predictions or guesses or even hypotheses. This show blows my mind. I can’t believe I have to wait another week. And I can’t believe that, as of right now, we have only six more episodes to go. We will definitely be left with a major loose end. 

On this our second evening of season four’s Lost episodes, I wanted to let you fans know that Hurley has a blog. Or, more truthfully, Jorge Garcia has a blog. While I can’t assure you it’s always G-rated, he is kinda funny and fairly accessible–like Hurley. He often posts humorous photos as well.

Additionally, here’s a fair recap of the first show with the writer’s commentary. A good review of the show’s highlights if, like me, you missed some of the more important moments due to the sheer density of the premiere.

I don’t think I’ll get to sit through the airing tonight, as the King and I have slept maybe a total of seven decent hours in four nights this week due to Butterfly’s tummy issues and Ladybug’s infected ears. We’re not high-tech enough to have Tivo, but the good old VCR still works well enough for me.

Whoa. It’s so good to have Lost back, even though it makes my brain hurt and even though I think about it when I wake up in the middle of the night. What an intricately planned, expertly timed show! I don’t know how the writers wrap their minds around all the storylines and keep them straight, but they do a good job of it (hopefully they’ll start getting paid what they’re worth soon so we can have more than eight episodes).

After last night’s episode, these things stood out for me (some of them may be mere assumptions on my part):

1. Only 6 made it off the island, including Jack, Kate, and Hurley. I presume this because Hurley yelled out, “I’m one of the 6!” Of those three, Jack and Hurley are in terrible shape–depressed, delusional, determined either to get back on the island (Jack) or to stay away from it (Hurley).
2. Charlie is actually and truly dead (not that I doubted this).
3. The survivors have split into two groups, which I have thought would happen for a while now–those with John and those with Jack.
4. The people coming from Naomi’s boat are NOT very friendly.
5. Ben chose to go with John, a man he had shot and left for dead.
6. Hurley saw someone in a rocking chair inside a rundown shack. Was that Jacob? And was that John Locke who looked out the window at Hurley before Hurley turned away screaming?
7. In the future, someone related either to the island or to Naomi’s boat people is out to get Hurley, at least.

What a show. I have no predictions. Does anyone else?

Finally, Lost premieres tonight! When the show ended last spring, it seemed like ages before the season 4 premiere. It will be a too-short season, for sure, due to the writer’s strike, but you can be sure I’ll hang on every episode. As some people say, I’m a bit obsessed with the storyline, though not to the extent described. I’ve simply found it a well-acted, precisely written and conceived, thrilling, and highly entertaining piece of television. Of course, I have little memory of what happened on the most recent episode, so count me among those watching the review show at 8:00 this evening. I’ll post about it later!

Since my beloved Gilmore Girls was cancelled last year, my favorite TV choices have dwindled. From seasons 1-5, GG was consistently funny, touching, and finely acted. After that, when the writing changed and conflicts over story direction evolved, it was still finely acted, but the actors had less quality material to present, including a bizarre side story involving leading man Luke (Scott Patterson) that seemed like something out of a soap opera. Of course, my King would tell you that show was nothing more than a soap opera all along, but I and other loyal fans would beg to differ.

So what to watch now? Like thousands of others, I eagerly await the season premiere of Lost, which I consider one of the most thrilling, mysterious, and entertaining shows I’ve ever seen. I’m not a fan of true-to-life crime dramas. They make me nervous. But the fantasy/science-fiction element of Lost makes it intriguing rather than nerve-wracking. Great acting, powerful stories, and, again, that overwhelming sense of mystery comprise this excellent show. I certainly need a recap before I enter this new season, though. This might help. See Recap in 8 min, 15 sec. (Thanks, Robin!)

I’m also a fan of The Office. Amazing acting, humor so over the top it sometimes makes me uncomfortable, and of course the fabulous love story of Jim and Pam–I could watch episodes back to back for hours. (Thanks, Monica, for lending me season 3!)

Now, only time will tell how much longer the writers’ strike will last or how deeply it will affect our favorite shows. Let’s hope for a resolution soon!